Monday, July 12, 2004

I've been in a bit of a blogging funk lately. I tend to be a bit manic - I'll oscillate from feeling like I have a great deal to say that someone, somewhere might actually be interested in hearing to telling myself, "What in the hell are you thinking? No one cares what you think!" It's hard to drown out those negative voices in your head. I've been reading Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions - it is a journal of her son's first year (great book, by the way). One of the recurring themes is the difficulty she has silencing the "crazy" voices in her head. The voices that tell her she's not a good mother, she shouldn't have been entrusted with a child, and darker, scarier messages. In talking to Sarah (my wife, who read the book first), we've had all of those thoughts running through our heads in our daughter's first five months. I want tell Anne, "You're not as crazy as you think. We think all of those thoughts too!"

So maybe the message for me, and many others, I'm sure, is that I'm not as crazy as I think. Even though those waves of self-doubt crash on me periodically (like ocean imagery - we just got back from the beach), I do have something to add to the blogging world.

On an loosely related topic, Chuck Currie is the proud papa of twins! I can't even imagine how much work that's going to be. Well, I guess I actually can imagine and that's what scares me. Our one is a handful by herself - visualize projectile vomiting on our bed at 12:00 am this morning.



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