Monday, August 02, 2004

Grief, Anger, Fear, and ... Hope?
I went through a cycle of grief, anger and fear dealing with cancer here and here two weeks ago. This weekend I learned that my father's wife has breast cancer. The optimist in me says that God was preparing me for this news. The pessimist says that the world is a just a really crappy place sometimes.

My father's wife is not my mother (I've never known her that way), but she is a mother. She's a grandmother to my daughter. She's also a daugther, a sister, an aunt. She is a wonderful, loving, nurturing person who is a joy to have in my life. I know that right now she's scared, but she also gives hope through her strength. She received the news after spending time last week comforting, nurturing, and being present for two friends fighting losing battles against cancer.

Her prognosis is very good. She says, "I want to get it over with and get on with life." My dad says, "It's just the crap you deal with in life." So while I'm scared for them, they give me hope. It amazes me that in this time of need, she is still giving. So I thank God for her presence in my life. I hope I can learn something about what a ministry of presence really means from someone who just plans on living.



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